Monday, August 20, 2007

It's A Windy Day

I’m coughing rather badly these days. It’s been 3 weeks and there’s no sign that it’s gonna stop although it’s not as bad now as when it first started. The violent “Kung! Kung! Kung!” coming out of my throat which almost made me regurgitate my supper every time has now been reduced to a whimpering “Kui! Kui! Kui!” that almost sounds like a puppy stuck in a manhole.

I’ve seen 2 doctors and I’ve tried all types of cough syrups and cough drops, none of which worked. All the Nin Jiom Pei Pa Koa in the world doesn’t work on me anymore. The same goes for air asam jawa and other traditional remedies.

My friend J said that this is the 100 days cough. It won’t stop no matter what, till at least 100 days. What? These germs can count one ah?

Whatever it is, I’m sick of trying to make it go away. The cough medications are making me groggy and all the pantang larang are making me lose out on a lot of things.

So, I’ve decided to give up trying to get better and I’m gonna ignore all the pantang-larang and whatnots and enjoy life as it should be enjoyed, and eat whatever I feel like eating, even if that means I’ll cough my tonsils out tonight.

Can someone get me some ais kacang please?

Despite the cravings for the sweet, ice cold and nutty ais kacang, the cough also caused me to lose my appetite, particularly in the morning. So I’ve been skipping breakfast these past few days, to more detriment than good, unfortunately. Now, if skipping meals of this nature would result in me losing weight, I’d already be Kate Moss by now. But no, in terms of weight loss, NONE whatsoever! Damn it!

What it does to me though, is give me gas. Sorry, don’t mean to be gross, but flatulence is only a natural bodily function that most of us find hard to discuss in public. Men do talk about it a lot. Women simply don’t. It’s unladylike. But I don’t care.

With my grumbling empty stomach getting harder and harder to ignore, I went ahead and had a good lunch today, after which, my tummy produced this humongous flatus waiting to be expelled. But for some reason unbeknownst to me, I can’t expel it at all. Maybe I’m just shy, maybe I’m just self-conscious or maybe I’m just scared of causing an explosion. After all, these gasses are known to be flammable.

Whatever it is, this anatomical whirlwind has been going around my intestines and bumping into things and making quite a big ruckus in there. My oh my, it’s Hurricane Katrina all over again, albeit on a slightly smaller scale of course.

Damn, it hurts.

It’s a windy day today, and that’s why I can’t do my work (as if I actually do my work any other day!).


Perhaps ill Verses, ought to be confined,
In mere good Breeding, like unsavory wind.
Were Reading forced, I should be apt to think
Men might no more write scurvily than stink.
But 'tis your choice, whether you'll read or no;
If likewise of your smelling it were so,
I'd Fart, just as I write, for my own ease,
Nor should you be concerned unless you please

(John Wilmot, the 2nd Earl of Rochester (1647-1680) )

5 comments:

Manal said...

Kentut jer laa....i suka kentut lpas bangun pagi, feels good to let go those angin perot out and what a trumpet sound it makes.

Btw, have u been smoking before? Is ur tonsil inflaming? just wondering what cudve affected u that much. Is it dry or chesty cough? U need to go to another doctor and this time make him/her prescribe u with a stronger phlegm dissolving syrups if yours a chesty one.

I had my worse cough end of 2002, sampai kua darah lagi to show how bad it was and sometimes it went on and on that it made me struggling to breathe while my eyes were already watery. I was like that for nearly 2 months and after i got prescribed at the NHS (that was in london that time), it gradually disappeared. Thank God for that. I did try buying those off-the-shelf syrups too but nothing beats the doctor's specific remedy.

Wishing u a speedy recovery.

Hjh Esah Jolie said...

Itu pasal I'm whisking you to Turkey...this (what u have) macam bunyi kuman kambing bebiri aje...

J.T. said...

Hi Sue

You are hilarious even when you are sick. You poor thing. Cough your tonsils out if you must. Pass gas if you must. It is all part of the healing process (if it is getting any close to healing, that is).

You take care, ok? I will be back to check on you. :)

Typhoon Sue said...

MANAL:
It’s okay if u’re at home. U can go trumpeting all u want. In the office it’s different. I can’t let out toxic gas just about anywhere. Someone might die!

Prescribed meds ke off the shelf meds ke, semua not working. Maybe I’ll try another doctor later.

MAKJI:
Kambing bebiri, no matter how icky it sounds, is still quite okay. So long as it’s not mad cow disease kan…

JT:
Going back to all my pantang larang now, no ice, no nuts, no grease. Coughing got so bad, I hardly get a night’s sleep last night.

About the gas thingy, I let it all out last night. Didn’t u hear that sonic boom from KL all the way to Germany?

J.T. said...

Oh! that was you. I thought there was a revival of the Concorde. :D