Monday, July 27, 2009

Ow, What's That Smell??

I had just arrived at a client's office for a meeting this morning when I smelled something bad. I thought I had already caught a whiff of it earlier while walking out of the parking lot, so naturally, I thought that the smell was on me. Maybe I stepped on something. Maybe my cats soiled my outfit. Maybe somehow, some animal poo got smeared on me when I wasn't aware.
So, I quickly excused myself to go to the washroom before anyone else arrived at the meeting. Upon very very thorough checking (and I do mean, very very thorough), I concluded that nothing was amiss. There was no smell on me, except perhaps for my perfume.
I went back to the meeting and carried on, still smelling that thing but not knowing where it came from. The other attendees, Fred, Sam, Lee and Don didn't seem to be bothered by it, so I guessed it was just my imagination. I recalled what happened last Friday, when my cell phone was ringing of the hook, and I was on the line the whole afternoon till 8 at night till my battery died. Even after I went home and my cell phone was switched off, I kept hearing the ringtone. I knew then that my imagination can play tricks on me, and so, I ignored it.
As the meeting concluded and we were all walking out of the meeting room, somehow, the smell got stronger, and as Fred turned his back on me, I realised it was him. Or rather, it was his backside. WTF??
Aiyoh... penat aje aku terperasan sendiri. It wasn't me lah. It was that mat salleh guy.
Hey Fred, go wash your bum every once in a while okay!!

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Say What??

Donna : Hey Fred, how can you tell when someone is gay, I mean, by their earrings?

Fred : What?

Donna : You know, if you wear your earring on the left or right ear, it means you are gay, and if you wear it on the other, you're just fashionable? Which is which?

Fred : Where did you hear that from?

Donna : I read somewhere that you can tell if they're gay from which ear they wear the earrings.

Fred : It doesn't work that way.

Donna : Yes, it does. I read about it.

Fred : No, no. it doesn't work that way. What if they wear it on both ears? Some men do that.

Donna : But everybody say you can tell....

Fred : I dunno then. If it's so, it must be the **right ear,............... coz I wear mine on the left (points to earring)

*Names and places (ok, no places, just names) have been changed to protect the identities of the parties involved.

** Oh dear, I messed up again. Fred said the right ear, coz he's wearing his on the left. I guess that's why nobody got the joke... :-( Edited on 13/7/09